Cake

All of the preparations have been made. We made our trip to Daube's. The party dress is washed and pressed. The only thing now is to pick up toys and wait for our guests... how will we keep from sneaking a taste of the cake?

Celebrate

I thought they were sleeping, but even the flowers and trees put on their party clothes today in honor of Ellie's big day.

She thinks that is pretty special, and I agree.

Crazy Legs

We call Ellie Crazy Legs. She’s earned the moniker. From the time she was small, when she’d get excited, her legs would just a move. As she got bigger, and was sitting up by herself, those little legs would really get going and she’d clap the bottoms of her feet together.

If you've never seen her do it, it's probably difficult to image what she looks like... but I'm sure it looks as weird as what you're imagining. (It is nearly impossible for an adult to replicate this. Don't ask me how I know that.)

It’s a riot to watch Ellie and her crazy legs… especially when she’s in the tub. She makes a splashy mess. There’s water everywhere. She’s like a human agitator. Maybe I should be tossing some laundry in the tub with her… now that's multi-tasking!

Affection

The love of a child is a wonderful thing. It's the stuff that makes adults soft and pliable. It makes us weak.

There is something special about the request, "Mommy, me sit your lap?" I don't get a lot of snuggle time out of my kids... that's not who they are. They're still very affectionate, but in their own ways.

Affection for Benett is offering his favorite car to you for a 'drive.' It's a little bit of lap time. If you're really lucky, it's a smooch.

This look, with these big brown eyes makes me go soft. I go weak in the knees. It's these big brown eyes that make me consider spending all day just watching him... being amazed by what he can do, what he's becoming... enjoying his personality.

And when I'm really lucky... then I get a smooch... and when that happens... forget about it. I become an irrational person who decides it's a good idea to spend all day in jammies. Forgetting about everything but my responsibility to him and his siblings.

As parents we learn early on to take the good with the bad. There are parts of being a parent that are difficult.... trying... just plain hard. But these gestures of love, which may seem small, make all that other stuff go away.

Contemplate

I was minding my own business today. I wasn't particularly inspired, but there is just so much to do at the office. So... inspired or not, the demands can't be denied. The pace has been hectic. More than busy... manic. It's frustrating and it makes me anxious.

In the midst of all of this, it happened.

Out of nowhere, it seemed so clear. I realized what really and truely matters most. The people in my life have always mattered most, but today the clarity of what that really means struck me like a bolt of lightning.

When I woke up this morning, it seemed like any other day. Ordinary. I didn't wake up and feel like anything particularly special would happen, let alone life changing. But the truth is, each day we all have the ability to make a change. It only requires us to slow down and listen. Listen to our hearts and then act.

The action part is difficult... sometimes it's a slow process. And waiting isn't always an easy thing. Instant gratification is more than a motto, it's a way of life. (The Kindle and Netflix have me spoiled.)

Sometimes action means that things move faster than is comfortable. At my house, we're creatures of habit and the thought of abandoning a comfortable routine... well that's scary.

But what I learned today is that the most important thing is to listen to my heart. It may catch me by surprise... but now I'm hooked. I can't wait to remain quiet and listen some more. Who knows, maybe I'll learn something new and unexpected tomorrow.

Indulge

Fat Tuesday is a day of indulgence. It's that one last day before the solemn time of reflection and deprivation that is Lent.

To be honest, I haven't ever really given much thought to a Fat Tuesday celebration at our house. The day only seems like an opportunity to justify this idea that more is better. I can't really get behind that... especially when we're trying to teach the little people about limits and moderation.

If Lent is about reflection and prayer, then perhaps today should be more of an outward celebration of life. Celebrating the vibrancy of our lives. Enjoying the boisterous nature of children and families. So in that way we did celebrate Fat Tuesday - big time!

Things were so vibrant in fact, that I decided everyone should go to bed early. This Fat Tuesday has also made me realize that my Lent will certainly be prayer filled... I'll be praying for patience... lots and lots of patience.

Bittersweet

For me, watching Ellie learn to walk is like watching as someone else plays a fast paced video game. I can’t relax and simply watch, it’s a work out!

I’ll lean this way then that way, brace myself, and then gasp as she corrects her balance at the last possible moment. I tense up and hold my breath when Ellie falls, to see if she’ll cry. (Trying the whole time not to look concerned or she’ll cry for sure.)

It’s tough learning a new skill. But for little girls, not only do they need to learn how to put one foot in front of the other… they need to learn how to do it while making sure they’re not exposing themselves. Walking and dresses is a complicated combination.

The whole process is bittersweet. We love to watch Ellie learning new things. It’s so fun to share in her excitement. But our baby isn’t such a baby anymore. Today she’s walking, tomorrow she’ll be running and then what… senior prom and a driver’s license?

Brick by Brick

Legos are a big deal, but not for the faint of heart. It's a dangerous business playing with legos.

They're small.

They're sharp.

It doesn't matter how well you think you cleaned up the mess... there's always one more lurking in the carpet... waiting for a bare foot to come along.

The other thing about legos is that there is no such thing as too many. Gavin has a really nifty storage unit for all of his legos. He's very carefully sorted them all by type and assigned a bin for each kind of brick.

Even though he has a gazillion pieces, there always seems to be one more set that he needs. He's always scheming and saving up for a new set.

Each set comes with a very detailed instruction book. It's fun to watch Gavin with the booklet open before him, as he intently searches for the correct piece to assemble his new favorite toy.

But even better than that is the thing that inevitably comes next. When the novelty of the new construction wears off, that's when the creativity really kicks in. Gavin has a desk full of trucks, 4-wheelers, space ships and other fantastic things he's built brick by brick, with no instruction, except that of his own imagination.

So despite the danger of losing a brick in the carpet, we'll continue to scatter the legos and unleash our imagination in an attempt to build something new and even more fun. 

Enough

I’ve had my fill of winter.

It's true, the top layer of snow is slowly melting and we can see that there is actually something other than more snow beneath it. That helps. But I’m tired of the bundling. I’m tired of the cold wind. I’m tired of the sand and grime that is tracked into the house every day.

Despite the fun that the boys had sledding today, I think they’re growing weary as well. Even their snow pants look tired.

Gavin's lost 4 pair of gloves this season. I think he's just tired of wearing them, so he takes them off and misplaces them. I can't say that I blame him. The winter dressing routine has lost its novelty.

As the days grow longer, our resolve does as well. The winter will give way to spring sooner or later. In the meantime, we'll continue to bundle up in our tired snow pants and drag sand and grit into the house. But in the spirit of springtime, I think we'll break out some short sleeve t-shirts for tomorrow.

Perspective

As a mother, having a routine is a necessity. With it, we all stay on track. We know what to expect and when to expect it. With a routine we get to school and daycare on time. Without it, chaos reigns and things just don’t feel right.

Basically, a routine keeps us all happy.

At the office, a routine is an okay thing when it comes to basic task management. There is a level of comfort in a weekly meeting, or a daily check of web stats. But when it comes to being creative, a routine can make me complacent.

That is the upside of travel. Don’t get me wrong, being away from my family and my home is tough. But being on the road is a great way to keep things fresh. It’s an opportunity to learn about other markets. It’s an opportunity to expose yourself to new cultures and people... to see your world in a new way.

For kids, there is no need to get on an airplane or learn a complex new business/product line in order to jump start the creativity. All they need is to be held upside down for 10 seconds and their world is transformed.

If it were only that easy for us adults... I'd stand on my head once a day if that would make me more creative. Maybe I'll start tomorrow. It can be a part of my new routine.

Flight

When things are going your way, it seems as though you can just glide through anything, doesn't it? It’s like a perfectly folded paper airplane slicing through the air. Gliding along, straight and true.

Gliding feels great.

If yesterday I was gliding, then today my paper airplane was folded funny and didn't fly at all. I couldn't fly straight, and eventually I began to spiral downward. I tried to right myself, but to no avail.

Today was rough. Nothing seemed to go my way. Each email, every phone call, around every corner there seemed to be a new issue that elicited a feeling of angst.

I left the office at 5:26. I had more to do. But I left anyway. I thought that if I got out of there, the remainder of my day would improve. But my theory didn't hold true.

I’m not sure if there was more of the same at home, or if I was still reeling from the bad day at work. There seemed to be a lot more noise at home tonight. Why does that always seem to be the case, when a hushed tone and a sense of peace are needed most?

I have to go back to the office tomorrow, but trust me… it’s the last place I want to think about right now. At least the kids are in bed. I’m not sure how we accomplished that without major drama. But they’re tucked away, hopefully dreaming sweet dreams.

I’d like to tuck myself into bed too and end my bad day once and for all. But things are quiet. I can almost feel that sense of peace growing. Maybe if I give it some time I will have the energy to mentally re-fold my paper airplane and get things in order so I can glide through tomorrow and into the weekend.

Small Hands

These hands are small. They’re little boy hands. Rough and tumble. Full of mischief and always ready to explore. The best way to judge a good and productive day is by the amount of dirt on these hands and under these fingernails.

These hands are attached to little arms. Little arms that were made for tight hugs. One of my favorite parts of the day is getting home from work and hearing, “me want to hug e-you.” And hug he does… And my day is instantly a little bit better – no matter what.

The little arms are attached to a smallish body. (Smallish but going through a growth spurt… this little body can pack away the food!) You can’t see it, but inside this smallish body is a heart. A heart that is anything but small. It’s so large that I’m amazed that it can be contained at all.

Benett shows his love in unconventional ways. When someone looks sad or is having a rough day, his way of saying “cheer up, things will be okay” is to give that sad someone his matchbox car/tractor/horse/train/stuffed animal.

He’s also happy to share his food. If you happen to be near him while he’s eating, you’re sure to end up with a morsel. It’s really an act of great kindness, although the recipient of the morsel might not know it. (Sometimes he takes the liberty of chewing it a bit before giving it away.)

He’s great at Eskimo kisses and smooches. Before we left his great grandfather’s house on Saturday, he made everyone laugh when he puckered up and tried to give grandpa a kiss. It was sweet, and genuine.

These hands may be small, but they have done great things. These small hands and big heart make a family complete.

Comfortable

This is a comfortable place. It doesn't look comfortable. We're just sitting on the floor, so technically, it doesn't really look like a place to sit at all.... But we needed a break. We needed to just be. As it turns out, this is the best seat in the house.

Like sitting in the middle of the floor, my routine has been unexpectedly comfortable. I didn't think that three kids and everything else that goes along with caring for and supporting them would feel quite like this. Life has been good and I'm very thankful.

Will things stay comfortably routine? Or like the impending change in season, will things begin to change? Either way, as long as I have my comfortable spot on the floor with my little buddy, I'm good with whatever comes my way.

Noodle

Something so simple as serving a meal has become a perilous adventure, filled with pitfalls and a level of stress that must be on par with the NASA control center. Before children, there were two questions:

1. 1. Eat in or Out?
1. 2. What are we hungry for?

Now neither of those questions cross my mind. Forget about taking these little people out to eat. I won't impose that on anyone. And if I only fed them what they were hungry for, they'd live on cereal, juice and pop-tarts.

The effort now is coordinated.

1. Give them a little snack while I'm cooking. Not too much but enough to keep the whining from starting.
2. Don't let them see what I'm actually making. Avoid at all costs the dreaded question, "What are we having for dinner?"
3. Get Ellie up off the floor and out of the way. She can start eating first. She'll also start throwing food on the floor, so that will occupy Benett. (And technically could qualify as his snack.)
4. Get the glasses filled with milk. But don't let them see you doing it, or they'll want to pick the 'right' colored glass. (Why do they always choose the color that's dirty?)
5. Make sure the glasses stay far enough away from the edge of the table.
6. Dish up Benett's plate first, so it can start to cool.
7. Gavin is next, but don't let his chair get too close to Benett's. (Apparently that's just cause for a fight.)
8. Don't try to sit down. At that precise moment, they'll need you to get them something.

When everyone is done eating, there's a feeling of accomplishment. (Or defeat. But that is directly associated to the number of vegetables included in the meal.) There is also a feeling of wonder. How on earth does a noodle get stuck in one's neck? How can pieces of chicken end up behind the ear? And why - why - does the stickiest part of the meal always wind up in the hair?

Sprout

Just when I thought I'd never seen another green thing again, it happened.

It's small. It's delicate, but green nonetheless.

The tomato seeds that Gavin and I planted last week are starting to push through the soil. So far only the over achievers have shown themselves, but I know the rest aren't far behind.

Like all of us, this tender little stem is bending towards the sun. Sooner or later the snow has to melt, and when it does, this little sprout and I are going to get our feet in the dirt.

I can't wait.